How LGBTQ+ friendly care homes celebrate Silver Pride

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Image credit: Belong Care Villages

LGBTQ+ friendly care homes that celebrate Silver Pride send an important message that LGBTQ+ people will be welcomed and positively included in life at the home.

Moving into a care home for people who have been ‘out’ all their lives can be a daunting experience. They may worry about revealing their sexuality to a whole new community of people due to fear of prejudice and being judged.

Homosexuality for consenting men over the age of 21 was only made legal in England and Wales in 1967, with Scotland not following suit till 1980 and Northern Ireland in 1982. This means that care home residents were brought up in an era when homosexuality was illegal. 

Fear of discrimination leads to some residents keeping their sexual identity private

Lesbianism has never been illegal in the UK and even though same sex couples can now get married everywhere in Britain apart from Northern Ireland, homophobia does still exist although it is not so widespread as it was. So it is not surprising that the fear of discrimination can lead to some care home residents wanting to keep their sexual identity private.

This is why it is vital that care homes make sure they show residents they are embracing diversity and being truly inclusive and one way of doing this is by celebrating Pride month which falls on June every year.

Silver Pride Day

The first ever official Silver Pride Day, took place in 2023, celebrating the lives and experiences of older LGBTQ+ people living in care homes and in the community.

Fairway View care home in Nottingham had a visit from drag queen Fanny Burns dressed in gold sequins, with 94-year-old resident Phyllis Bramley saying: “What an amazing day, I had so much fun and Fanny has fantastic legs”.

LGBTQ+ friendly care homes

Drag queen Fanny Burns said: “Luckily the UK is growing in acceptance, and this is shown by the fact that our care homes, like Fairway View, are supporting the right to be who you are. You don’t have to be LGBTQ+ to fly the flag – just flying the flag will make a difference to someone around you and make them feel loved.”

The Belong retirement village in Crewe brought together their residents, local community organisations, LGBTQ+ groups, and members of the public for an afternoon full of festivities and celebrations. This included musical and dance performances hosted by a drag queen, providing a safe space for everyone to feel confident being themselves, no matter their age, or who they love.

Belong Care Villages at the forefront of celebrating diversity 

While this is the first official National Silver Pride Day, Belong has been at the forefront of celebrating the diversity of their residents, promoting inclusivity, and tackling prejudice ever since it hosted its first Silver Pride event in 2018. Every year this has gotten bigger, with last year’s event seeing the Mayor of Crewe cutting the rainbow ribbon and joining the community in a colourful afternoon of live entertainment, activities and dining. 

Samantha Wolsey, 68, a transgender resident living in one of Belong Wigan’s independent living apartments, spoke out about the importance of fostering an inclusive culture in the care home, which was what ultimately encouraged her to feel comfortable being her true self. Samantha said that Pride month is important “to make people aware, more accepting and not revert back to when it wasn’t.” 

Speaking about her care home, she added: “Everyone is so accepting. I feel comfortable here, and I can finally be myself. If you want to talk to anyone, someone is always there for you. I can walk freely as myself. You can talk to any member of staff and customers are accepting too.”

‘People should be able to live and work as they choose to present themselves’

Caroline Baker, head of Dementia and Care Quality at Belong, spoke of the importance of Silver Pride: “We believe people should be able to live and work as they choose to present themselves as this makes for a diverse, respectful and cohesive society. We therefore have a responsibility to all our customers and colleagues to engender this culture, and celebrating Pride Month and hosting our own Silver Pride serve as some of the many ways we achieve this.”

Anchor care homes held some Pride themed coffee mornings for residents which included two resident guest speakers who shared their stories of being LGBTQ. They also held a Pride themed choir session where residents sang ‘True Colours’ and ‘Rise Up’ .

‘Events like Silver Pride bring our community together’

Sean McCloskey, regional support manager at Anchor, said: “To me celebrating Silver Pride is vital as older LGBTQ+ individuals have a shared sense of history. For those of a certain age, it is a time to reflect on the AIDS pandemic and how as a community, we overcame the prejudice against the LGBTQ+ community. Events like Silver Pride bring our community together to ensure those that have lived through so many years of inequality can come together to learn and share life experiences. 

“For residents, celebrating Silver Pride helps them to be accepted, supported, and connected. The importance of Silver Pride has never meant so much to so many.” 

Michael and Michelle are able to experience ‘the liberating feeling of being themselves without judgement’

In Essex, a care home promotes inclusivity by helping support its 84-year-old resident Michael to live as Michelle, helping them with their personal care, which includes shaving their legs, getting their hair washed and styled and making them feel ‘pretty’.

Michelle lives at Okeley Care Home in Essex, run by Excelcare, which strongly believes in supporting residents to live a happy life and having freedom of choice.

Hayley Gibbs, manager of Okeley Care Home, said: “Michael and Michelle receive daily support from our team, enabling them to embrace their true selves in each moment. Our team members begin each day by asking, ‘Who would you like to be today?

“Michael and Michelle frequently express their delight in experiencing the liberating feeling of being themselves without judgment and living with a true sense of freedom.”