Third of UK adults would refuse to move ageing parents into their home

The majority of adults would refuse, or need to seriously think about whether they would let their ageing parents move in with them if they required full time care.

An in-depth study from Care UK of 2,000 people with parents over the age of 60 also revealed only seven per cent have made plans for the future care needs of their parents.

The charity has compiled a list of reasons respondents gave for refusing to let their parents live with them, with the top two answers given was not having a big enough home and not being able to cope.

Two thirds admitted to worrying about the future care of their parents, but the same number told researchers they had never actually discussed the issue with family.

Jeni Rushton, care manager at Care UK, said: “We understand that the future care of a parent is an emotional topic and can be a difficult subject for many families to approach with their loved one.”

Care UK are encouraging families to have open discussions about care options and make the most of care options available to make the best decisions about future care plans.

Ms Rushton continued: “Support is available but it can often be hard to find. Talk to a financial advisor about your options and seek advice online. We work closely with families to understand their needs and advise on all the options of care available, from respite and at-home support through to nursing and residential care.”

Other reasons given for not having a parent needing full time care live with them included not having ‘that kind of relationship’ and lacking the necessary skills to deal with them. One in ten said their health wasn’t up to it.

Despite this, three quarters of people would feel awful if their parents wanted to stay with them and it wasn’t possible.

Associating feelings of sadness, guilt and concern with arranging external care for parents, just five per cent of adults said they talked about the topic of care regularly with parents.

Ms Rushton added: “From our experience, the thought of putting parents in a care home can come with great concern. Often the decision is made at crisis point – when parents need a level of care which families may not be able to provide. This can lead to a big decision that nobody was prepared for, which only heightens the anguish for parents and their families.

“Having an open and honest discussion about this beforehand – and perhaps trying out the options available - can save a lot of stress and heartache in the future.”

The Ccare UK report showed attitudes to personal care varied according to age, with adults aged between 18 and 24 most likely to look after parents and those aged over 55 the least likely.

Ms Rushton said: “I think the idea of looking after your parents is very different from the reality. This is perhaps why younger people are more open to the idea.

“As people get older, their own finances, how much space they have and bringing up their children are all factors which can make it harder for them to look after their parents.”