Couple who found love again in a retirement village say 'sometimes we talk till two in the morning'

Loneliness can be a real problem for many older people, however one couple in Bristol have bucked the trend by finding love again in a retirement village and getting married last summer, saying “we both assumed we would be alone for the rest of our lives”.

Marion, aged 81, first met Stuart Potter, aged 78, back in 1975 when Marion sang in Stuart’s band. In the passing years, Stuart married twice, had children and was widowed twice and Marion had married, had a son and got divorced. However, it wasn’t until July 2017 when they were both single again that Stuart, encouraged by his son, decided to ring Marion and ask her if she would like to meet for a coffee.

“I hadn’t seen him for years. I felt excitement and shock when he rang me but also apprehensive,” reveals Marion, who was living at Cote Lane retirement village, St Monica Trust. “But it was as though we had seen one another just the day before, it was more than friendship, the magic was still there.”

However she did have reservations about getting emotionally involved, saying: “I had looked after my mum for 40 years and when she died, it was very traumatic. She was my best friend. A few months later I had a heart attack and suffered from depression for two years. The doctors diagnosed ‘Broken Heart Syndrome’.

For Stuart, the realization that Marion was the one, was immediate. “Meeting Marion for coffee was the best decision I have made, we had long conversations and joked together and it made me feel so happy to be with each other, I lost no time following our meeting to get serious.

'We felt so much love for each other'

“Amazingly we felt so much love for each other in a short space of time and on a cruise ship at midnight in the Port of Madeira we became engaged and within six months we were married”.

Marion and Stuart married in June 2018 at The Holy Trinity Church in Westbury-on-Trym arriving together in style in a friend’s classic open top Morris Minor.

“It was a wonderful day, the service was beautiful and the music was fantastic,” said Marion, adding: “It was the day that we had waited for, a day we thought would never happen for us.

“My family and friends have known Stuart for a long time and they were delighted when we got together. My only son lives in Australia and he was always worried about me being on my own so he is very pleased that I married Stuart and we now have each other to love and care for.”

Stuart formerly ran a building and shop fitting business, he is also a talented pianist and plays classical, cabaret, dance music, and jazz, and is still playing professionally. Marion worked for British Gas and was also a professional photographer for many years.

'She is very beautiful and I am in love with her'

“We have known each other for a long time” says Stuart, “and when we met again recently I asked her to marry me because she is very beautiful and I am in love with her. We have a lot of things in common, we love music, going to concerts, ballet and shows, Marion comes to my gigs and concerts, we love traveling and socializing.

“I am a member of a men’s only club made up of musicians, entertainers and painters called The Bristol Savages, I play in bands in and around Bristol and on a voluntary basis play the piano in the Atrium at Southmead Hospital for the hospital charity.”

“Unfortunately Marion now sings only for her own pleasure but she is a very good ballroom dancer, a very happy, friendly and understanding person and someone I want to live with forever, l love her to bits.

“We love living at Cote Lane Retirement Village. They look out for you and we feel like we are permanently on holiday.”

Marion describes Stuart as a “very caring, loving, funny and talented musician who loves people and likes an audience”. She adds: “However he sometimes gets grumpy as ‘divas’ do” and jokingly says “his clothes can sometimes be quite outrageous”.

Marion believes the secret to a good relationship is: “You really have to trust one another and have respect for each other. It is about knowing how they are feeling by looking at them, it’s called unconditional love.

“We also talk a lot which is so important and sometimes we are still talking at 2 in the morning.

“We are so glad we have met each other. We don’t know how long we have got so we are making the most of it.”

carehome.co.uk recently carried out research showing love and romance are very much alive in care homes in the UK, with over a quarter of staff revealing their residents have become romantically involved with each other.

The survey by the leading care home reviews site found 27 per cent of staff said residents at their home had fallen in love.

Sometimes when one half of a couple needs residential care, they can be separated after living together for decades. However an increasing number of care homes are now offering couple rooms, with 27 per cent of care homes in the UK providing rooms for couples, according to figures from carehome.co.uk.

Other findings from the poll of 2,803 care home owners, managers and staff, revealed 23 per cent think residents should be allowed visits from sex workers, while two per cent say their residents do actually receive visits from sex workers.

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