Widowers aged 90 and 87 find love again in a care home

A care home in Stockton-on-Tees has been the setting for a new romance, with two of its residents falling in love with each other.

Alan Sanderson aged 90 and Dorothy Rowland aged 87, residents at White House care home, have been dating for just over a year.

Dorothy, who has two sons, four grandchildren and one great grandchild, revealed: “When I met Alan, we just hit it off.

“We have good fun together and Alan is really witty when he wants to be. We have the same sense of humour.”

'We have the same outlook on life'

Alan, who has three sons and four grandchildren, added: “We have the same outlook on life. Dorothy is young at heart. It has been a real treat going out for dates with Dorothy. We really enjoyed watching Downton Abbey together at the pictures.”

The couple who are both widowers, went on a double date on Valentine’s Day with the care home manager and deputy manager Nikki and Ben Brown who are married to each other.

Ben Brown said: “We see our personalities mirrored in Alan and Dorothy. Alan and I joke about getting told off by our partners.

“Alan has a fantastic sense of humour and Dorothy is a real thrill seeker. She recently went in a Ford Mustang racing car around a race track and we are now organising for her to do a wheelchair paragliding session.”

Prior to retiring, Dorothy was a lecturer at the old Stockton and Billingham technical college and Alan was a police officer.

White House care home was recently rated by the Care Quality Commission (CQC) as 'outstanding' and was commended for arranging date nights for residents.

Third of care home staff play Cupid and arrange dates for residents

However, care workers playing Cupid is not unusual as a recent survey carried out by carehome.co.uk, the leading reviews site for care homes, revealed.

The poll of 2,077 care home owners, managers and staff found 32 per cent of care home staff say they have helped residents who are attracted to each other go on dates and spend time together.

Over half of care staff said they have witnessed residents flirting with other residents at their homes, whilst one in ten revealed that they know of care home residents who go out on dates.

Nikki Brown, manager of the White House care home revealed: “We were incredibly lucky and privileged to be able to provide Alan and Dorothy with these date nights as they were genuine dates between two people in our care.

'It is a rare but very wonderful thing'

“They met each other in The White House and became very fond of each other’s company, however mobility problems were a huge restriction for them both. We quickly realised that we could do a lot more than just make sure we could get them in the same place at the same time. Staff started to arrange intimate candlelit suppers with wine and cheese on an evening. We would take them to a local restaurant for meals together and they even went on a date to the cinema together to watch Downton Abbey.

“Our efforts meant that these two individuals found meaningful companionship within a care home setting. That is a rare but very wonderful thing. You could feel the excitement from them both as we witnessed their relationship blossom. It felt really good to be able to help them achieve this.

“They have gone from strength to strength together and have even met each other’s families and attended their family events together.”

The staff have found it to be an “incredible learning experience”

Mrs Brown said: “We realised just how important this opportunity was and how we may be able to give someone else another chance at meaningful companionship one day. With this in mind we sought some wonderful training for our staff and we are now fully prepared to cater for an LGBTQ agenda should we have the privilege in future.”

'Romance is very important for residents' emotional and social wellbeing'

Forest Care in the south of England, has found “love is very much alive in our care homes,” according to its marketing manager, Chesca Ferguson.

She said: “Romance is very important for residents’ emotional and social wellbeing, fundamental to their holistic care. Outside of Forest Care happily accommodating married couples at our care homes with joining or shared rooms, we have also witnessed romance bloom across our homes and where appropriate, we accommodate and encourage this.”

Similarly care provider Anchor has also found romance is very much alive in care homes. Its director of care quality said: “Anchor is committed to providing homes where people love living in later life. A place where people can make friends, feel a sense of community and in some cases even find love.

“Care homes are places where different relationships can form, both old and new. There are lifelong couples who enter our care homes together and there are people who come in alone who form new friendships and relationships. With so many social activities and events taking place, romantic relationships can blossom and we support people to continue to enjoy their lives through the bonds they form and to live as independently as possible.”

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